Thursday, May 31, 2012

Damn the Lilac Bush

For the last two years I’ve heard nothing but complaints from Goose about the lilac bushes. They’re too big! They’re in the wrong spots! They smell too much! They make my allergies worse! They’re staring at me! And then finally …They need to go!

One day about a month ago, we were working out in the yard. It was a Saturday I believe. He walked past me with an axe in his hand and a look in his eye. I knew he was up to something. I paid no attention and continued on with my weeding.

Then I heard it. Whack! Whack! WHACK!!

The lilac bush on the side of the house was no match for Goose with his axe. It was a blunt cut through the trunk and he chopped off the larger branches just for good measure.

I watched him triumphantly carry the carcass to the top of Mount Crumpit to dumpit. (for the non-Jim Carrey fans, it was around behind the garage)

When I finished with all my yard & garden jobs I realized that I hadn’t seen Goose for awhile. Had the lilac bush gotten it’s revenge?
Was he lying in a heap behind the garage??
Was he tangled up in the roots and unable to MOVE?
 TRYING TO CALL FOR HE….oh no, there he is.

And he’s still smiling. What IS he up to?
‘Stay over there!’ was all I heard.

‘Do NOT come behind the garage.’
So I didn’t. I stacked wood. (ok, I really didn’t stack wood, but it sounds like a helpful wife, doesn’t it?) So in the middle of my ahem…stacking…he came over & said he wanted to show me something.
I was amazed! While in the storage shed, he had found my bathroom sink that I had bought for my last house and never got to install it. Last year I had an idea to make it into a birdbath, standing it on top of a tree trunk that Goose had also cut down. Hmm…I’m beginning to see a pattern here.

Anyway, my idea didn’t fly…since it fell over and broke when the ground thawed this Spring.
However, this new idea found my sink all crack-sealed & cradled in the remaining branches of the lilac tree. After Goose’s suggestion, we used grapevine to weave in and out of the branches to create a beautiful bird’s nest spa & bath. When it was finished, he decided he would dig a hole and stand it in it. I chose a spot next to the oval garden in the front yard.

We could not get over how lovely it looked. I kept using the word ‘amazing’ over and over. I could not believe that he had thought of this. A man. And I mean no disrespect whatsoever. But I have never come across a man quite so creative as this one. I’m a lucky woman. Luckily he does NOT read my blogs.

The next day we came out to take pictures of the new Bird’s Nest Spa (sounds a bit French don’t you think?) :-)

Goose thought he noticed more leaves on the tree than yesterday.
‘No! It must be your imagination.’
‘Yeah, you’re right.’
Two weeks later, the lilac tree was in full bloom of beautiful purple flowers. And Goose is sneezing into his sleeve.
Guess the damned lilac got his revenge after all…..